by Lisa J. Lehr

Nevada County is a very pet-friendly place. Most of us here have one or more pets. And pets, over the generations, have enjoyed a status upgrade from outdoor animal to family member, albeit one who lies under the table at mealtime rather than sitting in a chair like the other family members. Many people—including me—believe that a family without pets is incomplete, and a childhood without the experience of raising pets is a disadvantaged childhood.

That experience, though, almost invariably includes the death of a pet. It’s a fact that most people outlive most types of pets; almost all children who have a pet will, at some point, lose one. As difficult as it is for the kids—not to mention for the parents who must explain death—it’s an important life experience.

Sadly, some parents try to spare their kids the pain of losing a pet with some type of coverup—by offering another explanation for the pet’s disappearance, or by concealing the death entirely. The first scenario, mostly used with dogs and cats, usually involves saying it “ran away.” The “ran away” story is offered either when the pet is known to be dead, and the parents have discreetly disposed of the body; or when a pet has disappeared, its fate unknown. Bad things sometimes happen when pets go outdoors, and sometimes old or ill pets will go away to die alone.

The second coverup method is most often used with small pets—fish, turtles, reptiles, perhaps rodents. In these cases, the parent removes the deceased pet while the kids are at school or asleep, replacing it with a similar one and hoping the kids won’t notice.

Continue reading The Truth About Cats and Dogs: Helping Kids Cope With a Pet Death →